Kick Drum Heart


And still singing

It’s been a long day, even though I don’t know why, really. I beat Guitar Hero Aerosmith on Hard, so I felt accomplished.

The broken whammy bar started working after what might be considered one of the most magnificent hours of my life.

Today, I received a packet of papers in the mail. Within those papers, I was informed that I’ve been accepted into the Conference All-State Women’s Choir.

Soprano One, son.

I texted Emma.

Emma and Kiener called me. Emma told me she was calling Lerew.

I called Mrs. Ripley. Mrs. Ripley was ecstatic. Mrs. Ripley says she’s going to tell everyone she knows.

I texted Heather. By then it was eight at night and I was on the way to Franklinville for my sister’s football game (she cheerleads) and I didn’t want to hold conversation across spotty service areas in a moving vehicle. Hopefully she’ll call me back when it’s good for her, and if I don’t hear from her by tomorrow afternoon, I’m calling for sure. I’m so excited.

Nothing could put a damper on that news, except I’m tired. I’m just downright exhausted, so my enthusiasm is going to be shelved until tomorrow. I’ll siphon it back into my system then and do something really productive. Earlier today I decorated and established my JCC and creative writing binders, and got the rest of my materials ready and in my bag for school. As of tonight, there are only five more full days before my last first day of high school.

I just want to live it. I feel like I say this every time I blog, but dammit, I want to feel and exist in every single moment I’m blessed with. I want to feel alive, I want to experience everything good this world has to offer. And some of the bad, because otherwise there’s nothing to measure the great against.

If today was any indication of where hard work and practice and dedication and passion can get me, though, I don’t think I’ll have too difficult a time living each minute of my senior year. I worked my ass off for that one hundred on the audition paper. Puccini might have been proud of me, even.

So. Conference All State, here I come. And everything else. Watch out. I have a craving, a burning thirst for life. I plan to quench it.



Beside the yellow line

After what seems like forever– and still, like no time at all– it’s my last day of driver’s ed in Cattaraugus. Sam will pick me up at quarter after nine, we’ll arrive around ten, take our final exam, then wait around until eleven-thirty for the last road group ever with Mrs. Alico, Jesse, and Victoria.

It’s almost surreal. It hasn’t sunk in yet that I won’t have to get up at five-thirty tomorrow to go to Mark and Karen’s early. It hasn’t been quite realized that next week, I won’t have to go to Cattaraugus and see the rolling green hills and patchy forests pass me by.

It has definitely been an experience I’ll keep with me forever. Despite the hassle and the long drive, I’ve learned a lot– not just about driving– and had some interesting times with people I might never have spoken to otherwise.

Some memories…

~ first day of road group, &the first day of class.
~ “Victoria, you’re going to hit the curb” and she clunks her forehead trying to look out the window.
~ “Sam, are you straight ?!”
~ Almost getting killed by a freak driver who cut in front of us after blazing through two lanes of traffic. Thanks Sam, and her reflexive braking.
~ The first or second day of road group: Victoria saying “I’m no good at turning.” The rest of us: “Oh Christ.”
~ The Red Garter Inn and it’s spectacular view. Plans being made for a birthday/senior year celebration there for Sam, KT and I.
~ Going to Gowanda in the Driver Ed van.
~ My mother almost smoking and blowing the school up. No one told her there was a freaking gas leak in the parking lot where she was waiting for us.
~ Victoria saying, “I’m no good at backing,” and almost crashing us into a guard rail.
~ “Mayday, mayday; Mrs. Alico is not present. Do you read me, Roger? …what say we hijack the keys and take a joyride?”
Jesse: “What crack have you been smoking?”
Me: “I went to the Avett Brothers concert last night. It might be secondhand crack. Mayday, here she comes, mayday!”
~ No one hitting the cones! Not even Victoria!
~ Drunk driving while texting… in go-karts.
~ “My friend thinks the boys here are cute.” “Thanks, Sam.”
~ Redneck washing his hands in a mud puddle! the girls in class knew exactly who we were talking about, too.
~ Gripping the seat for dear life every time Victoria turned, backed, or parallel parked.
~ Going to Burger King, talking about being high and Star Wars cups and what kind of sauce to dip in.
~ Being very confused about make-ups, “I don’t think she knows what she’s talking about.”
~ Having Victoria actually be good at expressway driving… what the hell?
~ Jesse’s wry sense of humor.
~ Planning a pizza escape.
~ Actually talking to the kids from Cattaraugus, haha.
~ The ride to and from Gowanda with Mr. Wright, Sierra and Brendan. Verrrry funny.
~ Presentation day (yesterday): discovering Mr. Wright got his only ticket because he was traveling 97 mph in a 43 mph zone… Having our presentation be funny when I started talking (extremely strange)… Our delicious drawing of a tire.
~ Driving all over the countryside.
~ Talking to a cool trooper.
~ Never crashing the car.

I’m not going to miss it, but I will miss parts of it. The daily driving was a huge plus that I really would like to be able to keep doing, but I doubt it will happen. My road test is scheduled and my driver’s ed certificate should come in around the beginning of school to take money off of the insurance if I ever get a vehicle. But for now I’ll just be content driving whenever I’m allowed to, I guess, although I will push the issue. I’m busy enough without my parents having to cart me everywhere.

But it’s time to start getting ready. Only an hour and fifteen minutes before my last day of driver’s ed.