Filed under: My Day, Random Thoughts | Tags: blame, blog, boy, Christmas, clarify, day, done, energy, female, half-assed, here, insane, post, pride, sex, sleep, sugar, thoughts, winter, Writing
So, I had quite a few nice discussions with Kevin today. We talked about some subjects that would have made most people uncomfortable, but we plowed on through ’em, ha ha.
It helped me sort a lot out, though. Like, fun does not equal sex. As if I hadn’t known that.
But it did force me to clarify my thoughts about this boy I keep focusing on (for God knows why, too).
I don’t want him for sex.
I think I want him for company, and for comfort. And of course, for me to selfishly reassure my female pride, since it will have proven I don’t suck at talking to guys.
So, as long as that’s cleared up.
And alright, this blog pretty much just bottomed out. I’m done writing, for now. Probably when I think of something else I’ll type it half-assed and post it. Like I did here.
Urghh. I really just want to sleep. I blame the insane amounts of sugar in school today.
Filed under: My Day, My Explanations, Ranting | Tags: address, angry, before, besides, boy, cheap, cheap ho, compute, computer, cute, dad, day, eight, energy, furious, good, ho, honesty, language, life, living, mess, minute, mom, morning, mother, parent, purple, say, situation, think, time, today, trouble, walk, yellow
I got in trouble for my last post. My dad walked behind the computer, and, instead of being a parent, he asked my mother to address it with me.
I explained my situation and we’re all good. My mom did say my language makes me sound like a cheap ho, however, and I would concur. Except today kind of called for it.
Since the minute I got online this morning (before eight), I knew it would be a long day. I could say I’m not so angry now, but that would be a lie. I’m still really, really furious.
But in all honesty, it’s not worth my time. It’s not worth my energy to be angry.
And besides, I have discovered that I’m not a complete mess when it comes to finding a cute boy. The one I wanted, I got. It turns out he just needed a little more time to think than most people.
Yellow and purple do go together, after all.
Filed under: My Day, My Explanations, Random Thoughts, Ranting | Tags: achy, angry, bad manners, bed, bitching, bug bites, caitlin, cares, checking in, cheering, comment, comments, common courtest, constant, constantly, dickens, different, disgusting, doesn't matter, done, downtime, driven, energized, energy, everywhere, exaggerated, fall through, first, forgotten, frenzy, friend, get back to them, girl, goddammit, going to bed, great, hand, hanging, headache, hopefully, hyper, hyperactive, hyperactivity, i would, i'd tell them, irksome, issues, itching, laid-back, left, like, like the dickens, logging on, lose control, matter, needs, never, no control, no question, not crank y, not like, not necessarily, not used, oh no, page, peeved, per se, pissed, plans, ramble, said, saw, say, shift, sleep, smile, spam, stumble, suggest, think, thought, tired, too warm, translation, usually, views, whirlwind, won't work out, wonder, wordpress, write, yes
My first thought upon logging onto wordpress was, yes! I have spam!
It really doesn’t matter to me about receiving views and comments and whatever. I mean, this is for me to write and ramble on, and if someone happens to stumble across it and like it (or not like it) then great.
But I’d forgotten how cheering it is to know that someone actually saw the page. Someone’s checking in, someone cares. It makes me smile.
On a different hand, I’ve had a constant headache today. I don’t know if it’s the shift in energy– with Caitlin here everything seems more exaggerated, more energized, and I’m not used to that kind of hyperactivity. I’m usually a laid-back kind of girl, unless something needs to get done. Then I’m driven, but not (usually) to the point of frenzy. The house has been a whirlwind of frenzy lately.
So, I’m ready for some downtime. I’ll admit it. I’m just tired and achy and a little pissed. Why pissed? one might wonder.
Well, I guess I’m not really angry, per se. Just a little peeved. But when you suggest making plans with someone and then never get back to them, it’s irksome to the one you don’t get back to. Translation: goddammit, if I said I’d text you back about the plans we were going to have, I fricken would. No question. I don’t leave a friend hanging.
And I guess I was left hanging.
It doesn’t matter, and I’m not cranky because oh no, he might not “like” me. I’m cranky because it’s simple common courtesy to say if the plans won’t work out. And I’m not bitching about bad manners, necessarily, but I’d do it for my friends. I’d tell them when something was going to fall through.
Oh, yeah, and I have bug bites effing everywhere and I’m itching like the dickens. It’s too warm and I feel disgusting and did I mention I have a headache?
I’m going to bed. And hopefully just go right to sleep instead of brooding over issues I have no control over and will only constantly think on if I don’t.
Filed under: Events | Tags: !, asian, at the beach, audience, avett, avett brothers, banjo, bass, bob, bob crawford, bob the bass player, buffalo, buffalo rocks the harbor, bump on a log, cell, cell phone, cell phone illiterate, cello, concert, crazy, crowd, Damen, die die die, drum set, drums, energy, excellent, fan, fat, free, friends, front, fucking awesome, guitar, i and love and you, illiterate, ironically, irony, july 30, katie, kick-ass, lafayette, lafayette square, laundry room, live, marya, marya's mom, michelle, mom, music, phenomenal, phone, piano, picture, pudgy, queen city, scott, scott avett, security, security man, seth, seth avett, shove, shoved, show, stage, stand-up bass, standing, the avett brothers, thursday, thursday in the square, tia, trip, two hours, up front, waiting, wild
”
The Avett Brothers !
”
Scott & Seth Avett
”
… again. :D
The Avett Brothers rocked the shit out of Buffalo last night. They really did. I don’t think they expected to have such a massive fan base here– honestly, “Thursday in the Square” sounds like a farmer’s market.
But the crowd was wild. I stood with KT, Marya, Damen and Tia about three or four rows of people back from the stage, and holy shit did those Avetts have energy. Absolutely crazy. Bob and the Asian whose name I don’t know were great, too. They were just awesome. I wish they would have played “At the Beach” and maybe “Die Die Die” but other than that, I couldn’t have asked for a better show from them.
The crowd was stupid, as usual, though. These two pudgy girls (that’s not a diss on pudgy people, it’s a description and yes ok a slap to the two girls) blobbed their way in front of Damen and Tia, “looking for their friend.” Yeah, ok. We’d all been standing there waiting for over two hours to hear the fricken Avett Brothers and now they were taking up like five square feet in front of us. Katie and I were just to the right and a little behind Damen and Tia. So Tia starts dancing and jabbing at them with her elbows (a noteworthy tactic, I’d budged this one dumb woman who was standing next to me like a bump on a log that way earlier). And then these girls just start bitching her out, and the old guy next to Damen called them “real fucking classy” and then they left shortly thereafter. We were glad they were gone, but the fatter one shoved Tia as they waddled off and that pissed me off.
Oh well, though, because the music was stunning and the audience was nuts and the band was giving it all they had. If I ever (fingers crossed) have the opportunity to perform live with a band, I can only hope to have half as much energy and crowd appeal. They were soooo good.
That’s all for now, though, I have to go do laundry. Ha, ironically, “Laundry Room” just popped up on my playlist :)
I have one more picture that’s going to go up here later, too. Mom and Michelle were on the side of the stage way up front near the security man (they made friends with him, apparently) and they got a good one. But only one, since Mom is cell phone illiterate, haha.
Filed under: My Day, Random Thoughts | Tags: awful, bad, basketball, basketball game, bitchy, concession stand, concessions, cranky, disapproval, done, energy, excited, exhausted, feeling, feelings, fin, finished, finito, frustrated, game, good, happy, keyboarding, long, lovely, mood, muttering, national honor society, nhs, no, oh no, pillow, pillows, play, play rehearsal, powerful, productive, Ranting, raving, ruthless, sink, sinking, sleep, sucks, thoughts, time, tired, unhappy, Writing
I was so tired today. And less-than-energetic. And Little Richter wouldn’t shut up in keyboarding and it drove me insane. Plus, I have resumes and National Honor Society crap to do… not that it’s crap. It’s just stressful and time-consuming, when I have such little time to begin with.
It’s amazing I find time for this writing. I’m going to continue to find the time, though, because I’m sure this is good for me.
I really want to sleep right now. It’s too early, and I have things to do, but I really wouldn’t mind just drifting back into pillows and drowsing. It sounds so lovely, and peaceful.
I’m excited for tonight, though, I suppose. Play rehearsal, and then a basketball game to work (concessions). I hope play is productive. Sometimes we really don’t get anything done, and today, I’m honestly not feeling so peppy and friendly. I worry that I might get frustrated and cranky and bitchy. I hate it when I’m like that, despite how ruthless and powerful unchecked rantings make me feel (ruthless and powerful). It’s the after-bitching phase that sucks: the looks your friends give you and the muttering, and the sinking, awful feeling that maybe, shit, I just did something wrong.
Society disapproves of my bad mood. Oh no.
Kick Drum Heart 