Food (or lack thereof)
26 January 2009, 10:27 pm
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youngHere’s to wishing I could redo everything today from post-basement romp to now. I wish I wouldn’t have eaten anything; I wish I would have brought a hairbrush.
I just started feeling awful. I don’t have an eating disorder. That’s ridiculous, especially for me. (Come on, look at me. Seriously>) But I’ve just been so busy, eating often and healthily has had to take second fiddle to the many priorities already swirling around me.
So after eating only two granola bars, a bottle of Special K protein water, and two cups of coffee, a Tim Horton’s BLT, bagel, and cappuccino didn’t really sit so wonderfully in my stomach. I felt like puking and I had some awful cramps. After getting home and showering I felt better. The warm water washed away most of the uncomfortable, painful sensations. My mother said the same thing happened to her, when she was “young, and seriously stupid.” She ended up having to rush to the emergency room when she was in college because she only ate a little bit throughout the day and then a large meal later on. Her body wasn’t accustomed to it. Her diagnosis: an “irritated colon.”
It’s irritated, all right. My body is irritated with me. Sure, I’ve lost a few pounds over the past few weeks. But it hasn’t helped me in the health department, and I need to start eating better. I’ve gotten thinner, but I’ve gotten weaker. Without nutrition, I can’t function properly. It’s yet another added workload of thinking and planning, but I guess healthy food is going to have to be added to my priority list. I really felt like shit today, and I don’t want it to happen again. I’m too busy, too dedicated to so many things, to have to worry about a sudden bout of dizziness or the inability to carry something heavy without my legs shaking.
If music be the food of love, sing on
23 January 2009, 8:14 pm
Filed under:
Events,
My Day,
My Explanations,
Random Thoughts | Tags:
adjudication,
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all county,
antiphon,
audition,
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bogoroditze dievo radusia,
breath,
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yourAll county auditions are tomorrow. I guess, according to Robin, NYSSSA auditions are, too, because she thought I was doing one.. and I’m not. Ha ha. I wish I was. I wish I could.
But all county will be fun, and colleges won’t care if I don’t get into NYSSSA or whatever, they’re going to look and see my audition scores and NYSSMA adjudication sheets… at least, I hope so.
I am going to go practice the xylophone in my room as soon as I warm up. The dogs decided to chill (quite literally) in the woods somewhere for a few hours and mom and I were out calling for them. Then my student’s mother came and paid me, and we stood chatting in the driveway for a long while. It’s pretty cold outside.
Now I am going to practice, before nerves make me throw up. Hopefully auditions and the play tomorrow go well. Deep breaths, deep breaths, and cross your fingers.
Broken
19 January 2009, 9:44 pm
Filed under:
Ranting,
Writing | Tags:
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Dreams,
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vomit,
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word,
words,
Writing,
writing flu I am. Broken, that is. Or, I think my writing mechanism might be. Andd also my motivation button. And perhaps my focus lever, too. I can’t seem to get anything done. I’m a little distractable, and I find myself daydreaming. But when I try to make the daydreams into stories (and hoo boy, would they make some good ones), the words won’t come. It’s very unpleasant. I feel dirty, or slimy; a little tainted, like I have some kind of anti-word bug I can’t get rid of. You know the feeling when you have the flu, and you’ve been puking all day and your stomach believes it should still be puking? But you can’t vomit, so you’re dry-heaving and it’s completely uncomfortable and painful, yet utterly unproductive?
That’s how I feel. I have the writing flu. It sucks, man.
And plus I have a stomach ache, too… I hope to God I’m not getting the real flu, too.
Kick Drum Heart 