Filed under: Dreams, My Day, My Explanations, Random Thoughts, Writing | Tags: 2:08, basketball, blog, bus, done, fantastic, go, ha, home, house, laze, leg, lines, mrs. propp, nothing, Olympia, play, purple, realize, rehearsal, salad, seat, shoelaces, shot, sit, tonight, twelve, two oh eight, yearbook, yellow
So, I got on the bus today. Right at two oh eight. And upon sitting down in a seat, I realized that there was absolutely nothing I could get done at home. I’d be lazing around the house for four hours, accomplishing nothing. And eating.
So, I stood back up and walked off the bus. And back into school.
So, here I am, seated at Mrs. Propp’s computer, blogging and yearbooking and thinking about food.
I really want an Olympia salad. That would be fantastic.
Anyway. There’s a basketball game tonight, at home. I really want to go, but I have play rehearsal.
Come on, it’s not like I do anything at play, anyway. Until I know all of my (twelve) lines, there’s not really much I can do but observe where I move. And how to jump when my leg gets shot. Ha.
I’d need blue clothes, anyway. Maybe my mother will come to the game and bring me some. And some of Olympia’s salad.
On another note, I got a hug today. I passed this kid that I think I like walking in the hallway during twelfth. He said, “Hey, you,” and I honestly almost turned around to see who he was talking to. But it was me, ha ha. So I gave him a hug and he mumbled at me politely and then we went our separate ways.
I think I make him nervous. I know I make him awkward.
Whatever, though. I’d like a guy I can talk to about anything, who argues with me, and who knows when and what I’m feeling. I’d like a guy who doesn’t expect me to be experienced in everything sexual. I’d like a guy who can text me and have more to talk to me about than sex.
But for now, well. I guess I’ll settle with the one I have in mind now. The one with silly shoelaces and flippy hair who I never see to talk to. The one everyone says is so sweet. The one that doesn’t make any sense for me to be crushing on.
Yep, I think I’ll stick with him, regardless of the senselessness. As Katie is fond of quoting, “It’s not the years in your life, but the life in your years.” And my years have been pathetically lacking in life lately.
Filed under: My Day, Random Thoughts, Ranting | Tags: agenda, align, aligning, busy, can't, computer, cooperate, detail, details, dial-up, excited, fiddle, fidget, fifteen, handle, high speed, hurry, judd, katie, lightning, load, loading, loading spread, marya, minute, piece of shit, propp, sarah, schedule, school, shit, spread, tech, technology, theresa, time, tough, ugh, uhg, wasting time, wordpress, yearbook
“Loading spread” is what the yearbook site is telling me. Well hurry it up already, I only have fifteen minutes left before the four other girls and Mrs. Propp get here (to the school). Maybe even less than that. I’m finally supposed to be on a high-high-speed computer and it’s wasting my time loading?
Uhg, and I’m wasting time playing with wordpress. But honestly, I’m not going to wait around for the piece of shit to load. It needs to work, and work now. I’m a schedule, dammit. And my grandma’s computer is reasonably decent– I mean, it loads the site, which is more than I can say for my old school dial-up at home– but it’s no comparison to lightning-fast load time.
So I’m wondering where the hell my lightning loading is now. Piece of shit, piece of shit. I’m going to have to steadily fiddle with layouts all day today. It’s not the creating of them that is the tough part, it’s aligning everything and perfecting minute details that to the untrained eye might look normal. But to me, to anyone who knows the program, if it’s not right, it sucks. And I can’t handle that, not today. I have an agenda. I’m busy again.
As excited about that as I am, I want technology to cooperate.
Filed under: Events, music, My Day, My Explanations, Random Thoughts, Ranting, Writing | Tags: acoustic, acoustic guitar, advanced art, all state, all state solos, along, always, Andy McKee, ap, ap test, ap us history, art, audition, auditioning, away, bambi, baseball, baseball game, boys, can't, chem, chemistry, class, compelled, could, damn it, date, do or die, drift, drifting, drowning, dumb, essay, everyone, exhausted, exnay, explain, fail, feel, float, fond, fricken awesome, grade, guitar, ha ha, happening, have to, hello dolly!, history test, hollywood happening, hollywood theatre, home, importance, important, keep from drowning, keep going, kicker, legit, legitimately, let, level 6, level six, McKee, mention, move, muscles, music, musical, new, nice weather, nyssma, nyssma solo festival, nyssma solofest, out of it, percussion, percussive, pictures, puccini, pushing myself, relax, right now, rimsky-korsakov, shit, shit to do, song, stay home, strain, strains, stress, stressed, stressful, study, sweep, sweet, sweetness, tide, time passes, tired, treading water, try out, tryout, tryouts, twitterpate, twitterpated, unfortunate, until, up, varsity panthers baseball, vocal, voice, want, water, weather, wednesday, weekend, what's new?, why?, wish, wordpress, xylo, xylophone, yearbook
I wish I could do that right now. Just drift, float along the strains and percussive sweetness of Andy McKee’s fricken awesome song. But I can’t. Even though I feel stressed and out of it and tired, and like I’m just treading water until time passes, I can’t relax and let the tide sweep me away. I have to keep going, pushing myself and my muscles to move, to keep me from drowning.
I have sooo much shit to do. What’s new, right? But this time, it’s do or die. If I don’t bring my chem grade up, I am legitimately, for the first time in my life, going to fail a course. And I really want to get into Advanced Art. AND musical tryouts are coming up, and NYSSMA solofest is the weekend of the Hollywood Happening, and I am auditioning on level 6 All State solos for xylo and voice. And the kicker? I have an AP US History test this Wednesday, and hardly any time to study for it. Except right now. Ha ha. I have to go to a baseball game and take pictures shortly, also. Maybe I’ll beg off to stay home and study, but then mom would be confused and I’d have to explain the date and importance of that dumb AP test.
Oh, and did I mention boys? Always at the busiest times in my life I start to get exceptionally fond of them, and then I get even more strained. I think it’s the nice weather, everyone’s twitterpated. Ha, I love Bambi. :) But yeah. So, stress. Now I’m being compelled off of wordpress and toward my Advanced Art essay. Damn it, why can’t I just drift away?
Filed under: My Day, My Explanations, Random Thoughts | Tags: act, act ii, activities, activity, because, book, bother, busy, conditioning, damn, different, drop, ferocious, fierce, fifteen, gym, hall, ii, involved, key, keyboard, keyboarding, keys, me, minute, minutes, mrs., mrs. propp, murder, occupied, of, off, off book, out, out of shape, play, propp, really, resume, sh, shape, shit, study, study hall, suck, sucked, sucky, time, today, tonight, toodles, track, train, training, typing, when, work, working, Writing, yearbook, yep
I’m really busy.
As if I’ve never realized it before.
I’m working on my resume for keyboarding, and it’s reminding me that I really am involved in so many different activities– and I want to do track?! When am I going to find the time? I need to train something fierce; I ran fifteen minutes straight in gym today and I was winded. Maybe I should drop my study hall for conditioning, but then Mrs. Propp would murder me, because I use that time for yearbook.
Yep. I’m pretty damn busy. So busy that I’m not going to bother writing any more because Act II for play tomorrow is off book and tonight I had none of my lines memorized. That was sucky. So, toodles. I got shit to do.
Filed under: Events, My Day | Tags: alarm, anything, awesome, bath and body, boots, boyfriend, buy, Christmas, christmas tree, clock, day, dial-up, dishes, ducks, early, eyeliner, family, flash drive, four, friends, germany, gift, great, home, hygiene, independent, ipod, lotion, lovelovelove, mary kay, me, michelle, mine, moi, mom, money, morning, musician, nano, new, pajamas, pens, people, phenomenal, pictures, presents, quirky, scan, scanning, shallow, shampoo, sheep, shirt, skirt, snow, snowflakes, square, stocking, tannenbaum, time, tree, whoo!, winter, woohoo!, yearbook, yellow
Whoo! Merry Christmas!
What a day! I’ve gotten the least amount of presents numerically, but the most in value. I have a new (YELLOW) iPod nano, and a flash drive. And adorable boots, and a new Sabres bag (!) and an iPod home/alarm clock/thing, and a new skirt, and a shirt that advises onlookers to ditch their boyfriends for a musician. This is not including various stocking stuffers (mostly daily hygienic products… shampoo, lotion, etc., although I did get some sick Mary Kay eyeliner, and six new pens! I can’t help it, I love new pens… and some of these are purple :] ).
It’s awesome. Just fricken awesome.
And, for the first time, I had my own money to spend on other people. It feels phenomenal. I bought mom new (square) dishes, and Michelle now has a rubber duck, some stuffed sheep, two new sets of pajamas, and socks. All from moi. I love having money, as shallow as that sounds. That means I can be somewhat independent, and buy whatever quirky item catches my eye for my friends and family, and I love it.
Today has been a great day so far. I need to download iTunes v. 8.0 or something, though, which means my dial-up connection to the internet should be humming for, ahh, four hours plus. Oh, well. It will give me time to scan pictures for yearbook and load them onto my new flash drive! :D
Filed under: Random Thoughts | Tags: bittersweet, brisingr, crap, dell, eragon, mac, macs, minutes, musical, paolini, rainbow spinny-wheel of doom, time, yearbook
I absolutely LOATHE this freaking computer. If it didn’t belong to the school, I very well might have smashed it by now. Seriously.
I have seven more minutes until second period is over.
Six.
I haven’t been having the greatest time this week, and I can’t wait until musical tonight so I can make things happen, relieve some stress, and work on my character. Amneris is challenging, but she’s coming along. I go to see Mrs. Ripley this Friday for some character management help. : )
Ha, Mr. Bett just walked by and made a funny noise when he saw my blog title. (He’s producing the show.)
What’s wrong with titling my blog with my character’s name? Hrmph.
Three minutes. And then I can go return the book I borrowed from Miss Geist (Brisingr by Christopher Paolini, I love Eragon), then head to the mac lab to work some more on yearbook. Let me tell you, trying to edit our yearbook on THIS crappy-ass computer is a lost cause in itself. The mouse is a poor excuse for a useful object, everything takes twenty minutes to load, and the keyboard is discolored.In addition, the rainbow spinny-wheel of doom likes to terrorize me. Give me Dell any day.
One more minute! And I can leave the freezing-cold of the band room and travel the hallways. One more minute, and I can stop dwelling on the atmosphere of sadness that lingers in this frigid air. Almost everything’s been sad lately, or bittersweet.
Nine o’ seven! Off I go.
Kick Drum Heart 